It's been so long

Have been working so hard lately that my lack of blogging is something to be very ashamed off.

I am truly deeply sorry for that.

But so many things happened and it has made me thinking. Sometimes in a very black way and it's not all fun when I'm in the deep of my mind.

I call it the black hole or the deep of the ocean, were no light comes near us creatures.

Every person wears his cross and I don't mean this in a religious way, more in a 'what has life given or worse, taken from me'...

I can understand some people I've met through this last year now and some stories are bad, really bad.

I can see now why they move along in this life, having a backpack full of misery, and why a genuine smile is being held back or within this person.

I carry your misery with me ; from the moment someone's story is out there, I can't seem to let go of those words, for ever attached to their face(s).

I would like to take you away, alone with me, on a mountain top or wide left alone beach, no one knows, to scream our lungs out and cry for an hour or two and then laugh it all off, laugh at this freakin' life that has given us so much shit to cope with.

I wonder how you cope, in your worst hours...Do you drink and search endlessly for the bottom of every bottle ?

Do you carve into your flesh and is this why you never wear rolled up sleeves ?

Do you bang your head against the wall in your house or kick your fists against your bathroom door ?

Do spend hours in your shower, on the floor and get so numb you don't feel the water anymore ?